A MUST for anyone wanting to know how we feel!
Answers to the Survey on Grief

My journey of tears

What others say about Michael!

What happened to Michael

Celebration of Michael's Life!

Grief & Helps

How I lost weight... it works!

Why have I spent so much time on this site?

My Child has Neurofibromatosis

My biography

Fun biography

Message from dad

Little sister, "best buds"

Poems by Grandma,

Poem by sister

Youth for Christ Camp

When Michael was young

Kitty wants to tell you something, Michael

I want to Laugh & Dance


Are we killing our children?

More on Grief

Friends in Heaven

For me

I started writing our story

I would love an e-mail


Gifts given to me, thankyou!


What people have said about this site

Long overdue Thank You's


    My heart has a hole in it that seems nothing can fill.
    It is as if I am having a
    heart attack,
    the pain crushes into my chest with such force that it is
    hard to breathe!

    September 2002

    Trail of tears...
    click on the stages to read about them.

It seems that time changes my tears, as if they are stages.

  • What if (I had done this or that ) - started at 1 month after he died and lasted 4 months.
  • If only (I had known)- started around 4 months.
  • I miss him - 5 months
  • I miss him and the pain is increasing - 6 months.
  • Realizing my mistakes- 7 months.
  • A reason to smile- 8 months.
  • I couldn't protect him- 9 months
  • I'm scared- 10 months
  • Boy, was that hard!!!- 12 months
  • concerns about my actions- in the 2nd year
  • Cramming for GriefWork 101- 15 months
  • To Laugh again!- 17 months (working on it)
  • What Grief Counselors are Told- 15 months
  • I have found the smile I lost- 22 months
  • 2 years completed- 24 1/2 months
  • WHY?... Why Not?- 25 months
  • Thanksgiving 2003 my 3rd Thanksgiving
  • January 2004 wow it's 2004...
  • Imagine ...
  • Needy . . . ... July 2004
  • Remembering September 11 ...
  • One rainy gloomy morning in October 04 ...
  • Nov 22 04 (The life of a bereaved mother is a roller coaster ride of emotions. I sit down to write when I think of it but there are many times that I need to write about that get skipped over, due to lack of time or just the fact that I forget that I have a site. Sounds strange doesn't it? But that is my life now, I can forget I have friends that tell me to call them when I get down, I forget who said what, I can forget what I sat down to write....
    Just wanted you to understand there is far more than what I write going on... just as in anyones life...
  • A Special Dream ... Jan 05 ...
  • Things are getting better ... May 05
  • "You've Been Hit" ... Aug 05
  • He's not just anyone, He's my son... Does God Hear our Prayers? ... Jan 06
  • Normality ... Jan 06
  • A pleasant surprise... ... Jan 29 2006
  • Life again! Yea!!!! ... March 30 2006
  • My Life (the movie).... .. ... April 20, 2006

  • Beautiful worn rustic book ... June 28 2006
  • Can we question God? ... August 2006
  • Life changes fast... ... December 2006
  • New experiences... ... Jan 2007
  • Do you really mean it?... ... May 2007
  • Back home... ... Aug 2007
  • White Chocolate Lindor Truffles *~* ... September 2007
  • Christmas 2007... It's okay now.
  • March 08.. Getting Organized! and fun with FlyLady
  • May 08.. Tragedy of a windy night ...Eliana and Edwin

  • March 09.. My Inner Princess Brat






  • Books I recommend
  • Movies dealing with a bereaved parent
  • Songs that help

    • ((This page is under construction.))
      The reason for this page and the whole site is
      * first ... to help me with my grief.
      * second ... to help others, I wanted to know what to expect. I think it helps to know what others are going through.
      * third ... to show everyone my wonderful son.

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